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What if addiction isn’t about the substance, but the pain beneath it? Which emotional “hooks” might be subtly driving behaviors we don’t fully understand? Why does real change begin only when we take full ownership of our lives?
In this podcast episode, Joe Sanok speaks about learning to identify the “hooks” that trigger your addictive behavior with Dr. Adi Jaffe.
Podcast Sponsor: Alma
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Meet Dr. Adi Jaffe
Dr. Adi Jaffe is a psychologist, author, and addiction specialist known for challenging traditional models of recovery. His work focuses on understanding the underlying emotional drivers of addictive behavior, emphasizing that addiction is not about substances themselves but the deeper pain and patterns beneath them.
Drawing from both professional expertise and personal experience with addiction and recovery, Dr. Jaffe advocates for approaches rooted in accountability, self-awareness, and sustainable behavioral change. He is the author of Unhooked and The Abstinence Myth, where he presents a more flexible, stigma-free framework for recovery. Through his clinical work, writing, and programs, he helps individuals identify the emotional “hooks” that fuel destructive habits and build healthier, more intentional lives.
Visit Dr. Adi Jaffe’s website and connect on Instagram and Psychology Today. See also Dr. Jaffe’s workshop.
In This Podcast
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What has changed in addiction treatment
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The moment that turned Dr. Jaffe’s life around
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The “hooks” of addiction and how to spot them
What has changed in addiction treatment
I feel like the field has shifted over the last 15 years or so. Some people still talk about things in that old school way, of addiction [being] a disease, a brain disease, and that sort of thing … But I would argue that’s now one of the ways people talk about addiction, whereas 15 or 20 years ago, it was the only way people talked about addiction. (Dr. Adi Jaffe)
The field of addiction treatment has thankfully shifted, grown, and progressed over the last two decades.
While addiction was only treated as a disease in the past, it is now viewed through myriad ways, especially through the lens of somatic trauma work and internal family systems.
The old definition resonated with only a few people, which meant that treating addiction was difficult and alienated other folks. A broader approach to treatment helps more people.
Addiction is not about the thing you’re addicted to. It never has been, never will be. Just to me, just the fact that we call somebody who struggles with alcohol an alcoholic suggests that alcohol is their problem. But alcohol is not their problem … there is underlying emotional [distress]. (Dr. Adi Jaffe)
Dr. Jaffe elaborates by saying that if you focus on alcohol as the sole issue of someone who’s an alcoholic, you are aiming at the wrong target.
It is not the substance or the activity that someone is addicted to; it is much more about their internal struggles, and that needs to be addressed for recovery to be long-term.
If you keep looking at the substance or the behavior, you’re looking in the wrong way. You’ve got to look deeper. (Dr. Adi Jaffe)
The moment that turned Dr. Jaffe’s life around
After years of going in and out of rehab, AA meetings, and even running in with the law, Adi decided to put a final stop to his addiction.
It was that moment where I took full accountability for my actions. I decided it was up to me to learn how to change my life, that completed shifted the trajectory. (Dr Adi Jaffe)
While it took years to get to this point, because this desire and conviction truly came from his own personal self, he went through with it, got clean, and changed his whole life.
The moment that made the biggest difference in my life was the moment I actually decided to take ownership and accountability over my life … Was it easy? No. Did it still take years? Of course. Were there endless missteps? Absolutely. But that’s just life! … Life has ups and downs, you have failures and successes, you have wins and losses. I believe agency and accountability are the ticket. (Dr. Adi Jaffe)
The “hooks” of addiction and how to spot them
Adi recounts a story from his youth when he was between the ages of 14 and 15, feeling insecure and unsure of himself in the world.
He started drinking and smoking even then as a way to bolster himself and try to feel more secure. Dr. Jaffe explains that this is the true “hook” whereupon the addiction latches: these deeper feelings.
His low self-esteem was the hook that captured an addiction that grew into something much bigger, since he did not look deeper.
I was constantly analyzing my surroundings … and alcohol took that away. So, alcohol numbed because alcohol is an anesthetic, right, but alcohol literally numbed the pain of the hook, which was low self-esteem and low self-worth. (Dr. Adi Jaffe)
Dr. Adi Jaffe’s advice to private practitioners
There is something that makes you special in this work – lean into it. Double down on it, get comfortable with what makes you different, because it’s that which will make you stand out in a crowd.
Not only will this make your business more profitable, but it will also make this work more fun for you, precisely because it is fully aligned with who you are.
Sponsors Mentioned in this Episode:
Learn more about how Alma could support you in building a thriving private practice at helloalma.com/joe.
Sign up for the 2026 Group Practice Boss Conference! Use code PJ between April 16th to 20th and get $200 discount on your Group Practice Boss Conference!
Books mentioned in this episode:
Dr. Adi Jaffe – Unhooked: Free Yourself from Addiction Forever
Dr. Adi Jaffe – The Abstinence Myth: A New Approach For Overcoming Addiction Without Shame, Judgment, Or Rules
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Visit Dr. Adi Jaffe’s website and connect on Instagram and Psychology Today. See also Dr. Jaffe’s workshop.
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Meet Joe Sanok
Joe Sanok helps counselors to create thriving practices that are the envy of other counselors. He has helped counselors to grow their businesses by 50-500% and is proud of all the private practice owners who are growing their income, influence, and impact on the world. Click here to explore consulting with Joe.
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