Episode 100!!!!

[0:00] Music.

[0:28] Welcome to episode one hundred and so glad you’re here for legally made it this far,
this is so darn amazing on my gosh,
it’s just killing it so killer so it before i dive into the today show i really wanna thank the national association of counselors and private pro,
act as they are supportive community of counselors and other therapists that want to thrive and they want to succeed in the army awesome in private practice and through coaching training reading motivational tools group forum,
the association health clinicians do so much in regards to growing their practice to practice their exceptional,
see you get a hundred bucks off if you just head over to privatepracticecounselors.com/joe,
and it’s really awesome so heading over there now,
i believe it’s going through the end of the month but there’s gonna be i’m going fifty bucks after that so take some action and yeah well first i want to dive into so many of you,
the for each i guess so many of you left me voice messages just telling me how the impact of tracks the practices ben this podcast.
And now is the time for you to hear what all these listeners had to say and for me it is overwhelming and so cool to see you white you guys are doing,
well be and just like what i’ve done i mean you just take this to a whole.

[1:53] Music.

[2:01] Hi joe this is michelle hygiene it’s too hot in here joe this is amanda patterson from carrying therapists of broward i’m coming to you,
for lauderdale florida page so this is stephanie from pike county contact i do this is james carter president of the national association of counselors in private practice everett private practice counselor stockholm,
hey jarvis is michael down in asheville north carolina and it pass to synergy.com is an important part.
I am a psychologist for children teens and older otherwise family at,
thewifesfamily.com to the story coming from past difficulty playgrounds page of this is to you man free from both phones counseling and both raton florida bringing this mariellen.
Butter can a licensed american family therapist in the state of connecticut hello jill this is dr j cunningham us psychologist in arkansas.
I just wanna say congrats on episode one hundred phone such an inspiration to want sends you a congratulations on your hundredth episode.
Can’t wait till tuesday to hear it is going to be awesome sauce and all of your other ones have been super truly changing lives.
That is your favorite word is awesome.
I your podcast become a bit of a staple for me and very grateful for all the resources and tools that you bring it was just have on.

[3:32] I just wanted to call and tell you congratulations on your hundredth episode i love practice to practice this of humor the expertise.

[3:42] Music.

[3:51] Find a different page six on google search to page two in about three or four weeks and them shooting for page one.
I’ve always found you in made for june and in that time it’s now september hot on.
It is i have enjoyed it very much was.
To the previous ninety nine episodes i’ve really appreciate how genuine and authentic you are feel like i know you already think you for all that you do for to listen to your podcast everyday as a drive to and from work,
anyone they will be the most awesome conference you have really inspired me.
To move forward with my goals have to podcast in my top twenty that i listen to either of the other wifi places.
Part of the whole universe these the music is great.

[4:42] Music.

[4:50] Just got it and i’m having a friendly conversation with my friends or colleagues over half you know kind of the encouraging up lifting.
What’s the most special aspects and down step by.
Giving us really the concrete steps the building blocks look forward to listening to the next hundred satan if they thanks again for your.
Cast and all the work that you’re doing congratulations on your.
One hundred episode and she use to me mark is one sad brats joe thanks.
Congratulations on your one hundredth episode,
so think somebody congratulations and look forward to seeing we have for snacks one hundred amp service congratulations on your one hundredth episode i just wanted to say congratulations and hundred episode of facts of the fact.
It is really appreciate your and take genuinely ciara and how hard you try to share some of the information with us working gradually you on your one hundred episodes.

[5:52] Music.

[5:59] You know it’s funny how high the goshen like tearing up late listening to what i just created with all of you and.
You know it’s amazing to do work that you love whether your.
In private practice with your doing consulting whether you’re moving in a different direction to do work that you love.
Nu can’t show up for is just so important you know i’m thirty six half way to seventy two.

[6:35] Third of the way to nine the hundred and two hundred and two and it is just now really be finding work that i absolutely.
Spring out of bed for.
How is just such an honor and hear your voices on these names you know i’ve seen in e-mails on twitter like i know your real people,
what to hear your voice and know that i’m in your years and brain every single week in that you took the time to do that.
It’s amazing when you explains it all together and the music for me i was getting choked up there when.
So my interview today is with the one the only the amazing christine this anorak.
My lovely beautiful smart patient fabulous wife she stays home with their two girls and she’s an occupational therapist,
and she is just amazing and so without any further ado i give you the one the only the never replicated,
cristina welcome to the practice of the practice podcasts things happening yeah absolutely.
Well we are here in our dining room where both shower the girls are in the other room so you hear all sorts of stuff in the background how you doing today.
I’m doing fine they went camping two nights ago and i think worst kind of recovery yeah absolutely.

[8:13] Yeah we got home last night and go where on the back nine or nine thirty am,
yeah so well i wanted to have christina and the hundredth episode because she’s the most important person in the world to me and i could have this podcast or blog without her and many of you have not met her,
i know people that can last year’s most awesome conference you get to meet her and the girls casino and resort with who are you.
I have a question i am a mom to two girls a one year old and a four year old and wife to.
And i’m an occupational therapist.
And mainly work with kids i also have an undergraduate degree and after recreation leadership and management so.
I’d like to try and meld the two together and do adaptive recreation and.
We enjoy being outside and active when i’m not suprised but yeah that’s kind of our lifestyle we try for an.
The chocolate about the adaptive recreation stuff you’ve done because i think it’s super interesting but i grew up in a family of sailors and we.
My mom decided to start this act of sailing program.
And the first year it was launched it was the program director and so we kind of created a program here in traverse city where we can take out people of all abilities.

[9:47] And these folks that have been adapted with the joy stick and try to make it possible for.
Everybody to sale who wants the ability or opportunity to sale and then let them be as independent doing it as they want and so we’ve had people from.
They’ve there quadriplegic and able to sale boat.
Completely independently and we’ve had kids with autism out there who just.
Really melts when they get on a boat and it’s just a very calming soothing therapeutic thing for them and.
Veterans we’ve had people who have experience strokes come out and able to sale and there been a number of people who use to sale and then have injury or.
Whatever happened to them and then not sale so then for them to be able to do it again fairly independently has been a big deal for them so it’s been really fun.

[10:52] And great program for this community.
I know that like as not he sensory and sensory issues are huge thing out imagine sailing can ties in with that with some of these people’s issues or progress and i actually didn’t know anything about sensory issues till.
You went ot school so maybe give us like an overview of sensory issues and can that way you look for me to stay with kids.
Well actually what first comes to mind is.
When i was in grad school and joe’s practicing as a counselor he had a little hans joe had a client who.
War his shirts inside out and joe is the king of have so.
He really was careful but i would talk about kids with sensory issues and how tags and insure it so bother them are different things and joe had this kid who liked to wear.
Thirty-six inside out or something like that and it was that moment where we realize how much our careers kind of.
Overlap a little bit and that was really exciting time for us because the child can have.
Sensory sensitivities that may come across as a mental or.
Yuck and emotional and or mental health need right and it’s actually very biological or physical aspect to it so i can the classroom how does it come with kids after.

[12:31] It comes in a variety of ways i think some of the more common ones that in the schools is.
So this is like and won’t go down for her nap ruining our podcast schedule but she so cute yes and she wants to be in our hearts that microphone no can you touch it.
There’s a height.
What’s the hell leaving anybody hanging on this school sensory issues i know i think some of some of the things that come out are kids.
Having difficulty setting still and rough winter with this can of the room okay.
Many of us grew up in an environment where school was a place where you set stuff and you listened and.
We also have more recess time back in the day and says.
Kids need to move and marks learn more kids are struggling to focus in school and so tees will train give teachers and kids tools to.
Kind of accommodate this different school schedule and also always focus and.
Give them the movement needs there’s some really great questions that include therapy balls think it’s consider and will they work it asks there’s little disc.
Blow up disk seats that kids can sit on and we gold we come legal widow seat sir on rubber bands on.

[14:04] Legs of the chair so kids can kind of bumps their angles or do i pull on their whatever they want but um we’ve notice that.
And schools where kids have more outlets for physical movement be at gym more often or recess or just having our movement,
incorporated in a class kids tenants be able to focus my clothes cause the interview is in her down for a nap and a and will be back he just a second.

[14:36] Alright we are back like with seven hours later this by the last thing it was are we doing right now and our youngest daughter has not taken a nap at all today and it’s been a long day.
But we’re here is which is a great transition into being married to an entrepreneur,
so what are your thoughts on the life the glorious life listeners believe we have but not healthy for that month well.
Alright it’s twenty to eight eastern time and.

[15:15] Joe was working on a sunday night of the sunday night so i think some of it is pass due to scheduling and that it’s not always your consistent eight to five days a week.
And because you work for somebody else you can clock in at eight and leave at five and.
Say goodbye to your work and joe has to work really hard to.
Say goodbye to is work i think mostly because he loves it so much he really enjoys doing it and he can do it.
All the time and but he also loves his family and his kids and he really makes it a priority to.

[16:00] Forcing self to take time and,
spend time with the family because he knows it’s important and he does love doing that to him he wakes up excited to go to work and to do this sort of thing for all of you and.
And i’m so excited that he has found something that makes him wanna get up in the morning and go to work and.
So it’s in the handling at least like water sometimes you remember from our marriage that we may be low points repairs either the boundaries around work and home life or.
Things like that but i think there’s moments where sometimes.

[16:44] Sometimes.

[16:47] Joe is extra excited about something your really wants to work on something and we have to have a little discussion about okay the.

[16:58] How do we bring it back and how do we reset your schedule so that.
The focus is back on the family and will i remember a time,
when we lived in call prairie in kalamazoo and i just started private practice and it was like at that time i,
was on insurance panels and it was like this balance of light and his insurance salesman getting referrals from these other insurance panels and,
then finally occurred to take off and that wasn’t have my upright my life.
Forty hour week job and just was like so overwhelming i remember just like breaking down crying and it just too much and like those moments it think of a spouse to understand like.
I have a supporting those moments like water any advice you could give to spouses of people on private practices or small businesses.

[17:54] Well if i think they’re there’s definitely been times of frustration but for the most part i’ve been really excited about.
Joe from the about you think you can hear is her about you.
Going and the filling your dreams and you are very much.

[18:16] Much and ideas person and you are the type of person that sets your mind to something and makes it come to fruition.
And so to give you that space and let you do those things because that’s what fills you up as a person.
Is really important and i have to constantly remind myself because sometimes i feel and this is just my own thing that then i worry about becoming.
Put on the back burner or a family becomes put on the back burner and.
So i think that’s a challenge but i think reminding myself that your in the back of your mind you’re also thinking but i’m also doing this for the family.
And this is a way for you to support the family financially in a way that you’re really passionate about and.
So i think trying to have open communication.
Time for the background noise or our youngest is playing on the floor and he is not interrupting completely date so i one thing i have about what was it oh when you were trying to decide from.
He was in his full time job plus he’s he was working his private practice and working fifty to sixty hours a week with all this work together and.
At a point we works the numbers and sell that it was worth him going full of.

[19:48] Full force private practice and that he could support us doing that.
And he still didn’t quite trust himself or his skills and i weigh before you was like go for it this is totally work i trust you.
And i knew that if there was any struggle or challenge that you would take it head on and.
Chocolate and so you had to kind of run the numbers over and over and over for months and months and months and they said that you felt really comfortable with taking that risk and i think i’m more.
You’re more risk averse than in and so i think it was good that i was the one.
To first bank yeah go for it to work vs.
I’m leaving my job really well right when i think that was helpful and you are believed i asked you.
When you are like of course when i said.
You know if things get really bad like can you be raining in our budget and would you go work like anywhere just bring money and you are likely of course like and has to sit at home and,
like spend money from an like i had to figure out what was the root of my fear like and it was basically that we wouldn’t have the money to be able to make ends meet,
and so like when i knew that like you were like absolutely i’ll do that in your new it like i just need that like finally.
Box and it was okay not to leave and i you know when i was in my undergraduate program and finishing and joe was working full time in upper peninsula of michigan and making.

[21:32] I don’t even know me thirty thousand a year but driving to and half hours everyday and i thought your making even less than that but we’re on a really tight budget and we were paying off college debt and.
I think knowing what we’re capable of that when it really comes down to it and we need to really it’s,
pull in the reigns at a tight budget that were able to do that will not last because we lived off of ten grand that year we payed off ten grand in student loan debt and then,
we saved ten grand and sell wheel of death like ten grand in that little old a friend of her right and i’m not working right now i’m staying home with the girls and that was something that we were passion about and really wanted to make,
make work but we also had conversations that were i said you know.
Yes i have to i will go back to work i will work in a coffee shop or wherever or i’ll really look for a job in ot feel that.
You know may not be my ideal but it’ll bring an extra income and so i think being flexible and.

[22:43] For you understanding that we will do whatever it takes to.

[22:50] Take care of ourselves and our family that made it that much easier to make the jump and now it’s been really amazing and.
We’ve tried to choose really try to set his schedule so that’s realistic and he loves trying to take fridays off it is grey and i look forward to that and.
Timer time as a family so it’s but it’s still an adjustment because there’s times where joe.
Has lol in a schedule and who may be home a little bit more and then you have a really busy week and i have to kind of emotionally adjust because that means i have less help with the girls and so it’s kinda there’s an evan flow to it.

[23:35] I’m in the grand scheme of things i think it’s.
It’s been a wonderful set and i’ll wonderful adventure and then it’s practical way foundries the feeling we’ve said regards to your my worked time warner figure out or.
Even valid reason would hope we would set i really appreciate when you.
Say i’m not checking e-mails today for work or i’m not looking at my phone or.
Just send me like when i articulated.
Yeah not i know you’re gonna be fully present family cuz i know your brain is constantly working and could possibly be a business mode and.
That when i know that you’re trying to be fully present i appreciate that because.
Then it’s that kind of my worry of being put on the back burner having to compete with work is lasts and.

[24:42] So i can meet you and i put my phone on airplane mode while we’re driving camping and it was just awesome to know i even Texarkana come through right now and.
If people can be absent for two hours on airplane like what you all are driving and i think that’s a thing for.
A lot of entrepreneurs arm i would say i don’t know a lot entrepreneur’s but my purse my perception of entrepreneurs is that they’re constantly working and that.

[25:09] There.

[25:11] There they don’t set boundaries for themselves they don’t set an eight to five schedule or at eight whatever they dream they’re scheduled to be that for the rest of their family there isn’t a predictable routine.
And i know for myself and also for the girls to have a predictable schedule of with joe is really.
Forget.
Provides less stress for us and our four-year old isn’t asking as often when’s daddy gonna be home where’s daddy year and it’s the and if we know that he’s gonna be home before dinner.
Or
No in advance if he has a later night and i’ll be putting the girls to bed just knowing that well in advance and then trying to stick trying to stick to some kind of predictable schedule.
At least for our family is important because i know that.

[26:11] Can people can really stretch themselves with work and kinda get lost in that especially when it’s a passion and something you really enjoyed.
So i guess in moving forward with the business what post you haven’t received your schedule or an anything i don’t know.
That’s a good question i’m not really sure right now i have.
You know it’s always been our dream to travel more and to be able to take the girls traveling with us and.
We have been brainstorming and east coast i press the practice to or is family practice email addresses slate hill in the house.
How do you call it like to hangout with people we know from the east coast right.
Business and pleasure know there’s a huge cohort of people that nashville right and so i think.

[27:15] Part of joe becoming.
His own boss was trying to fill some of life dreams that we had hoped for ourselves from early on in our hair even before we were married we talked about running travel to be a part of our life and our kids life.
And that was a huge thing and.

[27:36] You know we don’t really we don’t care to live the super extravagant lifestyle.
What we dream of being comfortable and i think traveling and spending time with our friends and family is.
Some of the.

[27:59] Most important thing starts to us and we let living in traverse city we want to be by the water and on the water and maybe someday have a sale swimming in the water hotter and so.
Spending more time doing those things is kind of.
What’s the one thing i just thought about why you are kinda saying like how we have the similar dreams is listeners that are single that want to get married or i have a partner on the maybe people that are single don’t.
For those that do want a partner what for me they’re doing causing the people that are you know pretty marriage like what would be some advice you have an.
Just finding someone that matches what your dreams are where the cat conversations to have.
I guess we connected really well and is our dreams and how can other people do that i think just talking about it and.

[28:54] Asking each other really deep questions about their dreams and hopes joe early on in our relationship would ask.
Kind if there’s a lull in conversation we’re driving together something you would say so.
Tell me something i don’t know about you and i have to dig really deep to try and think of something,
but i think that was a good question as annoying as it was sometimes you pay the values of those guys i appreciate it now but,
i’m mental processor so it takes me time to sometimes think of things before.
Being able to express them and so.
But it also led to converse a some really great conversations about who we are and who we hope to be in i think in finding a partner.
You know joe and i it was important for us to find somebody that had a very similar passions but i don’t know if i necessarily think that is.
Important as important as being given the freedom to.
Pursue your dreams and passions and that is against the cia like that the last.
That’s five to eight my brain is like almost a million four times now i just remind in the head with the thing you said is not as important to.
Fighting with the same passions as it is to find someone that lets you go after your passions right yeah and but i do believe that it.

[30:34] Important to have some things that you do and enjoy together because you need.
To have those times where you connect and you don’t wanna be living parallel lives and hopefully agenda in reference to hopefully.
You want to spend time together doing things together and.

[31:02] So i think i think i’m still trying to fix i enjoy spending time with you and doing things together with you but now as a mom of two girls and being home all the time and trying to.
Do a great job as the role of wife and mom i’ve lost a sense of will what are my passions and dreams and goals for myself and.
A lot of them don’t necessarily include you now i’m a violinist and that’s really important to me and just.
Last week i joined a community orchestra and you did not just had it for years why won’t you tell what but then.
For me it takes it takes a lot for me to just accept joe’s help and watching the girls and not feeling like i’m.

[31:59] Not doing my job as a mom are waste by being and doing something that sells me.
Like playing music and so that’s been gosh.

[32:12] It started when your eighteen months old playing violence so it is a huge part of me and it definitely.
Fills me up and gives me life but it’s hard to balance all the things to let a pile of laundry go on folded and choose to do something for myself.
Is really hard and so what can i do to make that easier for you to go after those dreams.

[32:37] I think just being willing to.
To watch the girls and take care of things at home while i’m gone and also encouraging me mean you’ve been.

[32:50] Telling me to do something for myself for whether it’s an exercise class or.
Music or whatever it is.
But you’ve encouraged me to take time for myself because he definitely see that i need that and everybody i talk to says that i need them it’s just hard for me.

[33:12] To do and i get pretty anxious i guess leaving the house and.
It’s not until i actually get to that thing whatever it is or castro or workout class or whatever that.
I let go of anxiety and friends enjoy so seven question to live listeners that email me for mounds have constant home for a while in the state the private practices to the side thing outside the house couple days a week so.
Do you think that’s a pretty common feeling for like minded of primarily been with the kids.
If you are anxious about leaving the house or yeah i think so i think there’s i think from.
There are a lot of different amounts and there’s a couple of general camps there’s them on.
Who is ready to go ready to go to work ready to get out of the house and they know that their wired that way and.
That they want necessarily meant to be a stay at home mom and that’s awesome that’s definitely i admire that and those people that they know that about themselves and then there’s.
The man’s that know that they wanna be home and that’s great to and i think i’m kind of.
In between i love being home with the girls and having the opportunity to have that kind of freedom in my schedule to be there with them and then there’s times where i feel like oh gosh if i could just.

[34:44] Get out and so i did my friends to work outside the house they’ve said things like.
You know i wish i didn’t have to go to work or.
I have some friends who are teachers and that initials beginning of the school year they feel anxious or worried or just not excited about going back to work.
Because are leaving our kids are they spent all this time in the summer time let say it depends on the mom.
But i think it’s pretty common to feel anxious about leaving your kids and having any change in schedule for them and free for the mom.
Yeah just get a taking them camping and today is gone no gas were paid for it too girl we should just and two nights of camping in this would be suffering in the wilderness.
So for one you’re super easy interview like usually co host on the show once and awhile the out come on again sunday fun the fun its of every counselor in the world were listening right now like what would you want them to now but anything.
About anything gosh i think about right now i’m just thinking about dead air,
there be any did any of you wash home star runner cuz we’re super and they early in our marriage and there’s this whole skit about dad aaron asshole areas neoprene shown us maybe as have to google it.

[36:18] Anyway i’m feeling the day are christina’s thinking so every counselor in the world were listening right now.
I guess home so i’m just gonna speak for myself because this is what i appreciate about counselors that i have seen.
Or no the ones that give homework over resources so that when i go home i have something to read or look up or do to keep.
My session kind of going through out the week in my has something to work on and.
So i think that something that there’s i’ve had counseling sessions were.
I go and i said i talk maybe i get a little bit of suggestions or feedback but i think i need a little bit more than and i think.
Providing ways to and this is something i appreciate as not or when i try to do is not is that if i’m not there i wanna give my family’s resources and tools to continue throughout the week when i’m not there.
And so that they can improve their child skills.
So what is counselors can you do when you’re not in my life to help me.
Continue what we talked about in the session so i think that would be.
That’s awesome very and i think this is a real viking fridge well i would find time i know how you get the laundry and dishes done so.

[37:54] Well cristina santa aka my wife my partner the mother of my kids and so much more thanks for being on the practice the practice podcast thank you and congratulations to you and so so proud of you excited for your hundred,
episode i just said thank you thank you to all of the listeners out there joe really,
bless you and appreciates your support and how much these,
podcast a great day been going so i just wanted to steal a shout out at saying thank you and the answer is yeah things to show.
The mobile and we are gonna go students they can enjoy a beverage right now but enjoying about it if you were gone for an hour.

[38:43] Music.

[39:00] Forecast.

[39:02] It says you’re happy and can’t get him to questions that sure you’re not listen to you on that was for actually or you know honestly.
Just rocks.

[39:19] Music.

[39:27] Rocking at congratulations and for those that don’t know this on etsy.com.

[39:34] Music.

[40:08] Yeah ninety seconds long and prayers go to you for forty years old or over again because you were bypasses shows this messages going through but when he does and.

[40:22] Music.

[40:46] Ms two hundred apis it’s showing how to over at practice.

[40:53] What’s port slash session one hundred also think so much of an ass national association fax comes you guys are an awesome thing.

[41:03] Music.