What Is Your Inner Critic Really Trying to Tell You? With Emily Pagone | POP 1385

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Is your inner critic protecting you, or preventing you from growing? What fears show up when you give yourself permission to rest? How much longer are you willing to wait before pursuing the things that bring you joy?

In this podcast episode, Joe Sanok discusses befriending your inner critic with Emily Pagone, LCPC. 

Podcast Sponsor: Alma

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Meet Emily Pagone

Emily Pagone is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC), trauma specialist, educator, and founder of Authentic Growth Wellness Group. She specializes in trauma-informed therapy, Internal Family Systems (IFS), EMDR, perinatal mental health, parenting support, and helping high-functioning individuals navigate anxiety, burnout, and inner criticism.

Emily is also the host of The Inner Critic Podcast, where she explores perfectionism, emotional healing, relationships, and personal growth through thoughtful conversations and clinical insight. Alongside her clinical work, she teaches psychology at the university level and leads workshops and educational initiatives focused on mental health and authentic living.

Visit the Inner Critic Website and connect with Emily on Facebook and Instagram.

Befriending your inner critic 

Emily Pagone explains that building a friendship with your inner critic is a type of collaborative relationship. You can, rather than letting your inner critic run the show, listen to its concerns to gather data about your inner fears, worries, etc. 

Listening to it doesn’t mean that you are doing what it says, and ironically, taking note of these deeper concerns is a way of soothing them, your inner critic, as well as yourself. 

If this critic is worried about something coming up or worried about being seen, heard, or anything else, I remind myself that this part of me is reporting information to me about concerns … Instead of letting it take the steering wheel … I’m having to [stay] as an advisor to me … I’ll let it know I hear it, and then I have to remind it that, you know, “Emily’s here.” (Emily Pagone)

Dealing with the inner critic when you need rest

One of the first things you can do when your inner critic is active, especially when you want to rest, is to bring in your curiosity. 

Ask yourself (or the inner critic): “What are the fears or concerns that you have around this narrative?”

What’s driving the inner critic? [Name] it, get it out, and see if that’s true. (Joe Sanok)

Essentially, dive deep into the concern or fear to see what its narrative is. What is the fear, and what is it concerned about? 

With compassionate self-curiosity, you can name it, bring it forward, and open it into the situation at hand, because the response that you get could completely challenge the fear-based narrative for the better. 

I always have to remind my inner critic who I am, and who they are connected to … They forget all the time, so it’s like an ongoing dialogue … “It’s Emily, we can trust her.” (Emily Pagone)

Facing your inner critic when launching a podcast

So many therapists often hit on essential touchpoints with clients during sessions that could easily be developed and turned into a book, a course, or even a podcast. 

While the podcasting industry has boomed, especially over recent years, it remains one of the best ways to share ideas, connect with clients, and make your message heard. 

This is one of the reasons why Emily launched her podcast and why she became brave enough to face her inner critic. 

I’m realizing that 13 years passed, and I’m like, “Wait, what was I waiting for? Who was keeping me from an idea that gives me energy?” … All of my [inner critic] bouncers have worked on each side, this machine here, to the core, [driving me to] exhaustion … and I’m like, “Where’s the joy?” (Emily Pagone)

Once Emily hit burnout, she realized she had to change the way she worked. This pushed her to fully step past her inner critic “bouncers,” finally commit, and take action to bring her podcast career to fruition. 

If podcasting is something that you’re thinking about doing, you can chat for 30 minutes for free with Joe to see if Podcast Launch School could be a good fit for you!

Emily’s advice to private practitioners

Create moments of pause and spaciousness in your life to ensure you are doing the things that matter most to you. Be intentional, and be brave. 

Books mentioned in this episode: 

Dr John Gottman and Dr Julie Schwartz Gottman – Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict Into Connection

Resources mentioned in this episode:

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Meet Joe Sanok

Joe Sanok helps counselors to create thriving practices that are the envy of other counselors. He has helped counselors to grow their businesses by 50-500% and is proud of all the private practice owners who are growing their income, influence, and impact on the world. Click here to explore consulting with Joe.

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